When you meet a new person, do you make an effort to remember their name?
Or, do you say, “Shoot, they just told me their name, and now I can’t remember it!”
Like, two seconds later?
It happens to me, unless I make an effort to remember a name the second I hear it. Would you like to know how to do this in two easy steps?
Step one: Remembering a name is really easy if you associate it with something or someone. Like you have an Aunt with the same name… and this person kinda has big hair like her too. Or, their name rhymes with a kitchen utensil you rarely use and you’ve often found yourself wondering why you bought it – or was it a weird wedding gift?
Step one and a half: In order to give yourself time to think of all these interesting things, you can give the other person a chance to talk by asking a short, simple follow up question. While you listen. And remember their name.
Step two: Repeat the person’s name to yourself at least three times.
You: “Hi, I’m Theresa” — (well, not really, I’m Theresa. You put your name here.)
New person: “Hi my name’s Joe.
You: “Hey Joe, it’s a pleasure meeting you! What brings you here?” (To self: “Joe, Joe, Joe… rhymes with snow, hey! He’s from Fargo, I know… it snows a lot there!”)
Usually, this is it. It works almost every time — even if the person has a really unusual or strange name, like Cypress or Basil. Those are trees and herbs, right? So, maybe not so hard after all. Where do Cypress grow? Or is it, where does Cypress grow? (If you know, leave me a comment.)
Or, maybe their name is London or Everest. But wait a minute, those are places right?
You: “Hi, I’m Theresa” (or whatever)
New person: “Hi my name’s Ransom.”
You: “Hello Ransom. Wow, what an interesting name. How do most people remember it?” (To self: Ransom, Ransom, Ransom… like that cash you hope to get when you kidnap someone!”)
Final thought: People love it when you remember their name. Don’t you? I have people tell me all the time, “Hey! You’re really great at remembering names! I can’t do it all!”
What I don’t tell them is that there’s a really easy trick to it. Now you know.
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I have struggled with this for a long time. Your suggestions are great. But, lately, I have seem a dramatic increase in the frequency of exotic / unique names that I can make no associations with. In fact, I am often unsure that I heard it correctly, even if I ask for a repeat. How do you handle that?
Hi Jack,
That’s an excellent question! I hear a lot of new names too, names I’ve never heard before. You know, this can be a lot of fun. An unusual name can actually be the icebreaker to opening up a conversation.
For example, I’ll say, “You have a lovely name. Will you please spell it for me?” For a guy…”That’s a really strong name, I like it and I’ve never heard it before, will you please spell it for me?”Repeat their name a couple of times out loud and ask if you are pronouncing it correctly.
Most people with unusual or exotic names are accustomed to people struggling with remembering or pronouncing their name. The best thing you can do is make an effort. I think that goes a long way.
You can ask for a business card. Ask the person you’re meeting what interests them. Or, ask where you might offer support professionally. Then, with their permission, write it directly on the card while standing there. Now you have something to refer to several times during the event — giving you an opportunity to practice the name later.
It helps to write a name down, especially if you’re at an event and meeting a lot of people. Keep a little notepad handy. If the other person does not have a business card, take the opportunity to jot down their name and email address.
Another trick is to break a name down phonetically. Theresa becomes, “tur – ree – sa”. It helps to visualize each part of the name – create a picture in your mind.
New names can be really challenging to remember. I hope these ideas help! Thanks for your comment and great question!
Theresa
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