Approaching Someone to be Your Mentor

I get a ton of traffic to my blog from people who want to know how to ask someone to be their mentor. This post is part of a series on asking someone to be your mentor. Be sure to look for the links to the related posts at the bottom of this article!

In my post on How to Ask Someone to be Your Mentor I promised some additional examples of asking someone to be your mentor.

Having a mentor is an excellent way to acquire new skills and determine what skills you already possess and to explore your personal strengths and weaknesses.

A mentor can share personal experiences, be a sounding board for your ideas and give new perspectives to your strategies for achieving goals.

Here’s another approach to asking someone to be your mentor.

Find someone who has experience doing you what you want to learn about and ask for advice on a particular topic.

I recently wrote about a mentor of mine, Mike, who was investing in apartment buildings. I had experience in buying and selling single-family investment properties and decided my next step would be multi-family property investing.

In addition to doing a lot of independent research, I knew Mike would be a great resource for investing in a new asset class of real estate.

Using my friend Mike as an example, here’s an approach to asking someone to mentor you. This approach works almost every time.

Something like this,

“Mike, you are such an inspiration to me. I have some experience in real estate investing although it is limited to single-family properties. I’m very interested in learning about commercial real estate and would greatly value your expertise in buying and owning apartments buildings.

Would you be willing to guide me by telling me the top 5 things I need to know before I seriously pursue this?”

This gives me a great opportunity to start a dialog and to give Mike an idea how much I would appreciate knowing how he became successful and to find out what he would do in similar a situation, how he handled the same challenge I was currently faced with.

By approaching Mike this way, I demonstrated that I was willing to learn and accept feedback and that I had identified goals for my growth. By asking for the top 5 things I also set a limit on the amount of time I was asking of Mike — it may only take him 5 minutes to rattle them off the top of his head. He knows he is not making an open ended time commitment and will be eager to share his knowledge.

This is also a great way to see how well you work together. Was it enjoyable for both parties? If so, it is highly likely you will both want to continue the professional relationship.

Remember… Ask. Don’t hint, or dance around the topic, and don’t wait for a mentor to volunteer.

What if you don’t have any experience yet?

That’s a great question and the good news is, this approach can still work for you.

Here’s an example,

“Mike, I’m very interested in learning about commercial real estate and would greatly value your guidance in deciding if real estate investing is right for me.

Would you be willing to spend 15 minutes on the phone and tell me what, or who, inspired you to become a real estate investor and your best advice to someone who is just starting out?”

One last word…

And, I cannot repeat this enough. Always express gratitude.

Even if someone can only give you ten minutes of their time, thank them. You have made a great contact with someone whose expertise you value. Tell them so.

And finally…

It’s OK to tell someone you see him or her as a mentor. They will probably be extremely flattered, in fact, they may not think of themselves as mentor material until you plant the seed.

Don’t see what you’re looking for? Grab my FREE eCourse on Smart Tips for Getting a Mentor! This 7 part series will help you find and ask someone to be your mentor. You’ll also get 23 extraordinary questions to ask your mentor! What are you waiting for?